DEMIGOD WINZTON 4: Will Someone Ever Care for Me?

Complexities of life has always left me with no choice - even if how hard i try to believe things are okay, things still seem to go its way to just hurt me.

But how do we really say we care and when do we care? Do we really care at all? or just making ourselves think (without feeling we care) so as to satisfy our own selves of feeling that we do care.

Is caring really have to be mutual or should we care for oneself only or share it with someone, some people or to the rest of the world.?

It seems to me that I have been caring much and almost forgetting the risk of getting hurt all over again. I guess that's caring... giving without thinking of anything in return... BUT???

"will someone ever care for 
me,too?..."

@raremomentsinlife

Time to Let GO

I WANNA TELL YOU I FEEL HUNG UP AND I DON'T KNOW WHY...

I don’t see the smile you use to give to me
I don’t see the sad look in your eyes
I don’t know why it’s happening to us
I’m loosing you forever so fast

It’s hard to keep the pieces of a broken heart
There’s no mending
There’s no brand new start
Maybe I just have to face the truth
I’m losing you and there’s nothing I can do

[Chorus]
Maybe it’s time to let go
It’s time to move on
Maybe i’ts time to forget what we have shared
I just have to learn getting over all the days
We used to say
I love you, I love you

Tomorrow is a lonely day that I must face
To try and get back on my feet would be a waste
For how can I truly live without your love?
A life without you is not a life at all

[repeat Chorus]

There are many questions (many questions)
Left in my mind
I can’t find the answers why you’re mine
For I know
It is true
it is time to let go

[repeat Chorus]

DEMIGOD WINZTON 3: A Good Friend is just a FRIEND!

"...and yes we will remain good friends
as long as I live"

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The question has been pondered what does it mean to be just good friend

A Good Friend is:

SOMEONE who is there for you when you need a compassionate ears to listen to some of your problems…

SOMEONE who cares about the things that happen in your life…

SOMEONE who doesn’t  want romance just companionship..

SOMEONE who doesn’t make excuses for not coming to your special event…

SOMEONE you can lean upon when the cares of the world seem to be piling up against you...

SOMEONE who is there when you are in need of a kind shoulders to cry on and…

SOMEONE who laughs at your jokes… and
SOMEONE WHO...!?!?!?

Being just GOOD FRIENDS can be simply sharing a relationship with SOMEONE who is simply that, a GOOD FRIEND.

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... Well, I'm tired of pretending  but I'm terrified of it ending. I know if not for you there's nothing I could do to ever let it end. And I know you feel the same way, cause you told me drunk on your birthday and as you pulled to me you whispered in my ear, "Don't ever let it end"

We can laugh as we both pretend...  that we're just GOOD FRIENDS!

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DEMIGOD WINZTON 2: The Right Kind of Wrong

We’re all seeking for that special person who is right for us. But if you’re just like me and you’ve been through enough relationships, maybe you too, begin to suspect that may be there’s no right person… just different flavors of wrong.

Just like the past days and nights. I can’t sleep. Looking back at all the aches I’ve been through. Can’t help but ask myself, Am I the one causing this much pain I am feeling now? Should I blame myself for all this? Is choosing the wrong person to love the only thing I’m good at?

Yeah, I must admit, maybe I was wrong on some parts and I seek out for someone who is wrong in some complementary way. It takes a lot a living to grow fully into your own wrongness.

And maybe it isn’t until I finally run up against my deepest demons and embrace my inner corpse – the ones that make me truly who I am. That I am ready to find a lifelong mate. That I am ready to find the wrong person..

But not just any wrong person:

The right wrong person—someone I would lovingly gaze upon and think, “Hey, this is the problem I want to have”. The problem I’ll be more than happy to have every day of my life.

I can’t wait for that day. That I will find that special person who is wrong for me in just the right way..

Or maybe, I have found YOU.

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DEMIGOD WINZTON

My heart is in a million pieces...  I never expected to fall for you, it came quite soonest.  I am afraid of being vulnerable, I am afraid of being hurt. But mostly I am afraid of hurting someone else. I once said that “SACRIFICE should not be one-sided” But I proved myself wrong, I just learned that “SACRIFICE is just like LOVING SOMEONE UNCONDITIONALLY. You learned to sacrifice, without giving any second thought for the sake of the person you love… HAPPINESS cannot be bought either, it is earned and you earned it a long time ago.

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I found this song applicable to what I wanted to tell you, I just hope I can keep to the promise of this song… (please find time to listen)

I cannot wish for anything else knowing you are happy and that you had found someone who can make you feel even happier is such a blessing to be thanked for. It’s a wonderful thing.. 

I guess, I’ll just gonna LOVE YOU IN SILENCE.. I hope that this won’t affect nor changed the FRIENDSHIP we had.

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I hope I can be with someone like you but if destiny won’t favor me until the next ten years I would rather be dead. I made this a promise to myself... and I will.

“The amount of happiness that you have depends on the amount of freedom you have in your heart.” 

– Thicj Nhat Hanh